Thursday, March 31, 2011
My new Cat
I have 2 new cats but I guess I am calling the cool one mine. I like them both, they are both fairly entertaining, but my wife has laid claim to one of them. She keeps refering to the grey cat as my cat so I will have to name him today. I have a few ideas on what to name him but so far... nothing. *sadface* So I was thinking of some different names and fake stories associated with them as an explanation for a stupid name for my cat. Theo: I could say that Malcom Jamal Warner saved my life in a tragic bus crash when I was a child and I named my cat Theo after him. Fireball: I rescued my cat from a burning building or some other form of heroism and I thought that fireball would be a name best suited for the kitten that wasnt consumed in flames. I guess my Malcom Jamal Warner story inspired me to a fake act of heroism. Galaxy: My cat crash landed here in a space pod that I discoved one late night while star gazing in Lincoln, Nebraska. (or I could name him Lincoln?) Chopsticks: I could claim that my cat would only eat chinese food for the first year of his life. *Human Name*: I could name my cat a human name and go on all sorts of adventures with him. Then when I recount the story I could refer to my cat in such a manner as this: "Then just when I thought all hope was lost Carl reminded me that I had to take off the radiator cap" person replies "who's Carl?" "what?" "What? O.o" Or I could have really cool facebook status's involving my human named companion. "Carl and I got waisted. I can't believe he went beer for beer with me" Deceased Celebrity name: Still could have awesome Facebook statusi (plural for multiple facebook status) "Dom Delouise and I are going to watch Magnum PI tonight"
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Serve the Public Trust...
Crime, drugs, and poverty have plagued motor city Detroit as employment opportunities leave this once great city. As the unemployment rate in Detroit continues to rise the citizens of this once great city begin an exodus that would leave the population of Detroit halved its former size. As employers and the unemployed seek greener pastures the once great city of Detroit is left in shambles… a shadowy husk of its former self. Detroit then becomes its own biggest enemy as crime rises to the fourth highest crime rate in the United States.
Things look pretty dire in motor city… what is an average citizen to do. The mayor of Detroit, David Bing, calls for its people to come to action. He calls for Detroit’s great citizens to rally to its aid in an attempt to revive the city they love. Ideas pour into the mayor’s office at an alarming rate, but none as impactful as RoboCop. Honoring the 1987 movie, Robocop, that stars Peter Weller as the title character with a statue. David Bing has went on the record as saying that he has no plans on erecting a statue to honor Robocop…
As of today, after my one dollar donation to the cause, the effort has raised $58,944. This total exceeds the $50,000 that Detroit said that they would have to earn before they considered erecting the statue. I am really excited to see that this project may actually happen. Land has been donated as a site for the life size statue of Detroit’s her, and now with the proper funding, provided by the internet at large, I hope that this becomes a reality.
This may be a small gesture to some, but in so many ways this is a big deal for the city. This effort shows that you can accomplish anything as a community if you put your mind to it, and you believe in the cause. When Detroit needed a hero to save it that is just what it got.
Links to the websites
https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/imaginationstation/detroit-needs-a-statue-of-robocop
http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=176409349068272
http://detroitneedsrobocop.com/
Things look pretty dire in motor city… what is an average citizen to do. The mayor of Detroit, David Bing, calls for its people to come to action. He calls for Detroit’s great citizens to rally to its aid in an attempt to revive the city they love. Ideas pour into the mayor’s office at an alarming rate, but none as impactful as RoboCop. Honoring the 1987 movie, Robocop, that stars Peter Weller as the title character with a statue. David Bing has went on the record as saying that he has no plans on erecting a statue to honor Robocop…
As of today, after my one dollar donation to the cause, the effort has raised $58,944. This total exceeds the $50,000 that Detroit said that they would have to earn before they considered erecting the statue. I am really excited to see that this project may actually happen. Land has been donated as a site for the life size statue of Detroit’s her, and now with the proper funding, provided by the internet at large, I hope that this becomes a reality.
This may be a small gesture to some, but in so many ways this is a big deal for the city. This effort shows that you can accomplish anything as a community if you put your mind to it, and you believe in the cause. When Detroit needed a hero to save it that is just what it got.
Links to the websites
https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/imaginationstation/detroit-needs-a-statue-of-robocop
http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=176409349068272
http://detroitneedsrobocop.com/
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Use this guys Resume as a template and you WILL get hired
So a coworker of mine showed me this insane Craigslist post that I absolutely loved. Sure it is crass and whatnot but it is still hilarious/disturbing enough for me to want to post it.
I don't know where people like Steve Madonna are hatched but keep up the trolling. It is pretty funny.
I don't know where people like Steve Madonna are hatched but keep up the trolling. It is pretty funny.
New Blog!
Ok, I think this is the last blog I make for a while... Not blog post but just blog in general, and that is what this is... a general blog.
I need to slow down using my elipses (...) too much of a good thing.
I decided to name the blog Atomic High Five because I still love to High Five... the fist bump (or "dap" in some circles) does'nt really do it for me. High fives, when done properly have a great noise on impact. If you made a similar noise when "dapping" someone probably has broke thier hand.
Right now I am going to take a moment to explain the Rules of the High Five
To the left is a typical High Five (or Exhibit A) as seen at many sporting complexes, and on the internet. Notice the triumphant look on thier faces. Truley a sense of accomplishment. Perhaps thier favorite sports team scored a goal/homerun/touchdown/ awesome-NBA Jam-inspired dunk or something... I don't know... I wasn't there. This typical, and albiet traditional high five is reserved for this type of celebration. Warning: This traditional high five is not to be used at hospitals, funerals, or after the birth of your first child.
Exhibit B: This is the Jumping High Five. This is reserved for personal acts of triumph for one or more of the participators of the said high five. These sort of celebrations are reserved for promotions, getting a date with someone out of your league, and succesful bank heists. Needless to say, in my youth I used the Jumping High Five when I got my first date with my wife. She is smoking hot. I have very rarily had a succesful bank heist so I hadn't had the ski mask jumping high five variant that I would like to try someday before I die.
Exhibit C: The Interspecies High Five is the most coveted of the high fives. Some theorize that it is God himself that is possesing this bobcat that is High Fiving the TV and sketch comedy star Andy Samberg. The more exotic the animal the cooler the high five. Here is a breakdown to use as a general guidline for Interspecies High Five.
1. Household Domesticated Dog/Cat
2. Trained Monkey/Panda
3. Mountain Lion
4. Great White Shark (or any member of the 80's band Great White)
I need to slow down using my elipses (...) too much of a good thing.
I decided to name the blog Atomic High Five because I still love to High Five... the fist bump (or "dap" in some circles) does'nt really do it for me. High fives, when done properly have a great noise on impact. If you made a similar noise when "dapping" someone probably has broke thier hand.
Right now I am going to take a moment to explain the Rules of the High Five
To the left is a typical High Five (or Exhibit A) as seen at many sporting complexes, and on the internet. Notice the triumphant look on thier faces. Truley a sense of accomplishment. Perhaps thier favorite sports team scored a goal/homerun/touchdown/ awesome-NBA Jam-inspired dunk or something... I don't know... I wasn't there. This typical, and albiet traditional high five is reserved for this type of celebration. Warning: This traditional high five is not to be used at hospitals, funerals, or after the birth of your first child.
Exhibit B: This is the Jumping High Five. This is reserved for personal acts of triumph for one or more of the participators of the said high five. These sort of celebrations are reserved for promotions, getting a date with someone out of your league, and succesful bank heists. Needless to say, in my youth I used the Jumping High Five when I got my first date with my wife. She is smoking hot. I have very rarily had a succesful bank heist so I hadn't had the ski mask jumping high five variant that I would like to try someday before I die.
Exhibit C: The Interspecies High Five is the most coveted of the high fives. Some theorize that it is God himself that is possesing this bobcat that is High Fiving the TV and sketch comedy star Andy Samberg. The more exotic the animal the cooler the high five. Here is a breakdown to use as a general guidline for Interspecies High Five.1. Household Domesticated Dog/Cat
2. Trained Monkey/Panda
3. Mountain Lion
4. Great White Shark (or any member of the 80's band Great White)
No one knows why one would deserve such an awesome high five, but I hope to someday get a high five from a girrafe or rhino. I think a Rhino High Five would beat a Bobcat High Five any day...
Anyways... Internet High Five!
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